- Name Mrs Helden
- Home country Germany
Mrs. Helden has told us about her experiences and impressions about her son’s High School Year abroad with EF to the USA 2002/2003.
Before he left, the whole family was a bit tense. No one knew what our son’s new host family would be like, if he would be ok there etc. We didn’t worry about him becoming homesick though, since he has traveled alone before and was a quite independent already.
I think the hardest day for me was the day after he left. I didn’t think about the time difference, was worried why he didn’t call and didn’t realize that he couldn’t call in the middle of the night to tell us that he got there ok. Also, I didn’t realize that his new host family would take him along to activities and show him around the first day, so that he didn’t get the opportunity to call until the day after. The time until he called was a bit tense.
After that, most things returned to normal and reasonable fast we got used to him not being home. When our friends asked us: ‘How is Hauke, when did you speak to him last, do you miss him terribly’?, we replied that we were doing fine. His host mother made sure that he called us once a week so we were in regular contact. And because we talked to him regularly, we weren’t worried. I must confess though, that Hauke sometimes was a bit upset that he had to keep calling home. He was often so busy with his new life in America that he called and said: ‘I only have ten minutes and then I have to go’. For our family, that was ok. We were happy that our son had found so many new friends and had a good time.
When talking to him, we discovered that he became more and more independent and mature. He started to care himself about what grades he made and developed more ambition that we unfortunately hadn’t seen before, which made us happy and proud.
Finally, Christmas came. Our friends thought it would be really hard on us, but I have to say that it wasn’t that hard. I had first been really scared about spending Christmas without Hauke, as well as nervous about how he would feel about being away from his natural family. But there was no need to worry. Hauke called us as normal and there were so many activities over the holidays that he didn’t have time to get homesick.
I cannot tell you how, but suddenly the year was almost over. During his last weeks in the U.S., we surprised Hauke with a visit. He was lucky enough to be able to take part in the graduation ceremony at his school, so we could come and experience it with him. It was so nice to meet all his new friends and his host family!
Now, he has been back for three weeks and it seems like it takes a bit longer for him to get back into normal life at home, than it was to settle into his new life in America. We also have to get used to the fact that our son has grown a lot this past year and is much more mature and independent than when he left. And he has got get used to following our rules again.
My advice to other parents is to be happy that your child is learning and experiencing something new. Also, keep in contact during the year to be able to feel that everything is ok. I talked quite a lot with Hauke’s host mother, not only about Hauke but about anything. I also told her that during this year, Hauke was living them and should follow their rules, not ours.
I must say that everything went so well. Our youngest son has now also decided to go abroad for a year as well and I’m convinced that when you let your children go and are happy for them and the experience they are getting, then it will become a good year. So, this coming year, we will also have one son less at home and it will be just fine.
